Who Says Romance is Dead?

I got a voicemail from my Pure Romance (read: sex toy party) consultant Annette the other day.  Here’s the bulk of it:

“Hey Ashley, it’s Annette from Pure Romance.  Hope you’re staying dry (no pun intended).  I am checking in with you, young lady, because you have not responded to my email that said I owe you $40 in hostess credit!  I was wondering if you wanted me to send you something or if you wanted to wait until next week because I will be coming home from Nashville with new product. We have no idea what we’re going to get so it’s going to be a MAJOR surprise, for me and for you!”

First of all, I never received said email so this was QUITE a shocker.  In more ways than one.  I don’t think I’ve ever received a voicemail so amazing.  I have free money to spend?!  AND, there are new products to select from.  Hook it up, Annette.  Hook. It. Up.

I called Annette back but she couldn’t chat because she was checking into her hotel in Nashville, but she texted me later:  “OMG!!!! The product line is off the chain.  Bronzers, lip stains, lipsticks, up-all-night wipes and so much more!”

Umm, I’m sorry, but I buy my bronzer and lipstick from Lancome, girl.  What about the real goods?  The battery operated kind?

Then she wrote this:  “And new toys, too!”

Phew.  That…was a close one.

I just wanted to intro Annette with our most recent encounter, but I’ve been meaning to pimp her out on this blog anyway.  She has done 2 Pure Romance parties for me and I will never use anyone else when it comes time to gather the girls and fill our goodie drawers.  She. Is. The best.  Why?  Well, she’s fun, knows how to engage the crowd, and she has an arsenal of sex knowledge and tips.  Oh, and this is how she rolls.

That’s me at my 26th birthday.  And yes, those are vibrators in a rifle case.  Talk about…packing the heat.

For the last party I hosted with Kate as a “pre-Valentine’s” soiree, Annette brought a clearance bin and it was pretty much the most amazing thing ever.  Edible panties for $5?  Yes, please.  I mean, I probably wouldn’t pay more than $10, but I thought $5 was quite a steal.  Here we are checking out the goods:

Poor Natalie didn’t even see that shlong coming.  Literally.

Oh, and look who else showed up!

Wait a minute, is that….what I think it is!? Edward, put that back in your pants!!

JK.  I stuck that “Mr. Dependable” on him.  Wondering why I have a lifesize cut-out of Edward Cullen in my apartment?  Don’t worry about it.

So, basically if you want to do a sex toy party, Annette is your girl.  Check out her site, give her a buzz (ha) and prepare for a good time.  Better get her while she has all those new goods from Nashville, too.

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One Response to “Who Says Romance is Dead?”

  1. OMG!!!! I’m crying with amazement, joy and gratitude. I so appreciate you “pimping” me out. You are a wonderful person. Thank you so much and from the bottom of my heart.

    Annette