The following is a real conversation. My friend’s name has been changed because…she’d probably want me to.

Me: my health insurance broker called me skinny today.

Serena: nice!

Me: but it was over the phone. and I lied about my weight. soooo……

Serena: omg. that is really funny. I mean….they asked me my weight and height before they gave me my IV. and I lied about my weight.

Me: oh good.

Serena: but, then I was like NO I LIED because I didn’t want them to not give me enough and it wouldn’t work!

Me: how much did you lie about?

Serena: 5 lbs. it was embarrassing

Me: I lied by 7.

Me: ok  I just lied again.  it was 9

Serena: that’s a lot